The Lotus Flower
by wanweirdd
Summary: She was as beautiful and graceful as a lotus flower, but as sturdy and strong as a mountain.


_**Disclaimer : I own nothing.**_

* * *

_As a lotus flower is born in water, grows in water and rises out of water to stand above it unsoiled, so I, born in the world, raised in the world having overcome the world, live unsoiled by the world._

I never understood what that saying meant until a day ago.

Before, it was just a bunch of words, a jumbled mess of letters . . . but now I see it's much more then that.

It means that some of us are like the lotus flower. We can either drown in the water that covers us or we can push through and rise up – overcoming this mess of a world.

Nothing, Everything, Anything, Something - if you have nothing, then you have everything, because you have the freedom to do anything, without the fear of losing something. I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them - if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.

I took a breath through my nose, taking in the earthy smell of the garden. My calloused feet sunk into the soft dirt beneath me, feeling each sound, each movement. I could feel the grass slowly growing. I could feel the footsteps of servants and the heartbeats of life. Each I thrive on because . . . I could almost _see_ it. I could almost see the sounds and the movements and the footsteps and the heartbeats.

I could _see_.

And it's because of the earth and the soil and the grass and rock. They give me reason.

"Lady Bei Fong." A servant called from behind me. "It is time for your fitting." I could feel her bow her head respectfully.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, scrunching my face instead. "How long will it take this time?"

She chuckled, "It will be quick if you hold still."

"Oh, but you know I can't do that." I muttered dryly, standing from the stone bench.

Fitting.

For my wedding.

I know I said that I am free but . . . there are some rules that can't be broken – such as marriage. A _proper_ Earth girl is to have her husband picked out for her by a Matchmaker. And this would have been absolutely fine by me. I don't really care about marriage – it's only a piece of paper that would hold us together.

But . . . this is different.

I am to marry Zuko, Prince of the Fire Nation.

I am to be a Princess therefore I will have Princess duties.

I won't be able to sneak out and have a good fight, won't get to wander or play in the garden and . . . as the Princess, it is mandatory to give the Prince a child.

My body shivered in disgust, unease creeping up my spine. I don't want to do, to do_ that. _I'm only sixteen and though it is the average age for Earth girls to marry – I still feel too young. I've never matured and I don't think I ever could. And to be a Princess? I don't know what my parents said to convince them of me being fit to marry into the Royal family but it must have been a good bunch of lies.

"This way, Lady Bei Fong." The servant murmured, leading the way to my bedroom. I stomped my foot silently to feel vibrations, happy to find that my mother won't be in there.

It's not that I don't like my mother, it's more that I resent her for choosing my husband for me. We could have at least had dinner with him to see if we could even keep up a conversation together. But I didn't find out about my marriage until a week after they finished signing the papers and planning it out. I threw a fit about the whole arrangement. A massive one. It took twenty Earth Benders to hold me down, much to my satisfaction. But my fit didn't do any good – if anything it made my parents want to marry me off quicker. And not only did it get rid of me, but it also gave them higher titles and more money.

_I'm just a doll they can just sell away._

"Lady Bei Fong!" The seamstress called as I entered the room. "Come here, we have much to do!"

I groaned loudly, causing some of the women to whisper to one another. With a smirk I walked to the middle of the room. "Let's get this over with."

_It's going to be a long day._

"Ouch! Watch it will, ya?"

* * *

**One week later.**

* * *

The wooden carriage rocked back and forth, setting me on edge. Not only could I not 'see' anything, but we'd been in this stupid thing for over six hours. I felt a headache coming on . . . a _huge_ one.

"Mom?" I asked, rubbing my temples. "How much longer 'till we get there?"

I could feel her shuffle, moving to set her hand on my own. "We're almost there, Toph. Just a few more minutes."

I huffed, removing my hand from under her's. "You said that an hour ago." My voice mumbled. Closing my eyes I felt the sun creep through from the carriage windows, falling onto my porcelain skin.

It's strange, but when I see that it's going to be sunny outside - I go into this swirling chasm of terror and horror and dread. I'm one of those people who get pathetically happy when they hear the rain drops against their window I don't know, maybe the weather wiring in my brain was just programed wrong or something.

When I become aware that it's going to be a sunny, sunny day - my mind starts running through a couple of things.

Firstly - if it's a sunny day then it means it's still just _another_ day. I have to get up and go to breakfast and talk to the same parents, and the same people, and the same earth bending teacher about the same things again, and again and _again_.

And it means that the day hasn't been counseled and I can't just sleep through it and as they say - _that's the thing about the days, they demand to be lived_.

Maybe I don't want to live the day. Maybe I want to just sleep through it – maybe I want to sit in my garden and throw rocks at the wall. Maybe I just want to yell or run or walk or scream.

I can't carpe diem or seize the day or no, no, _no! _What if I don't want to? What if I want to just watch the world slip away and watch it slide out of sight as I scream into my soggy bed pillow? If it is sunny outside . . . there are going to be responsibilities. And if there are responsibilities, I'm going to have to deal with them.

I am aware that I'm only sixteen. I'm also aware that I have servants and that if I want something, all I have to do is snap my fingers and _poof_ – there it is. But, when I hear the thunder in the distance and I sense that it's going to rain . . . and it's going to start pouring down and it's going to turn the world into this magical sea.

I just smile.

Maybe it's some horribly, deep rooted psychological thing where I take joy from the darkness knowing it will make others equally, if not more, unhappy then I know the sun makes me feel. Maybe some part of me that I'm not entirely conscious of is still clinging to that dream you have when you're young of being this dark, misunderstood, poetic soul, that only takes comfort in the dark, unforgiving lash of the rain.

I don't know . . . all I know is that it's sunny today and since it's sunny I have responsibilities. Responsibilities that I would rather not handle until I'm thirty-five . . .

"Toph! I can see the Palace! Loo – um . . ." She shuffled. " . . . Are you ready?" My mother questioned.

I rolled my eyes, replying bitterly. "Ready as I'll ever be."

She sighed, "Now Toph, promise me you'll behave. You are to be a Princess in less then six hours and as such, you must show maturity and grace."

"Yeah, yeah." I grumbled, waving my hand nonchalantly.

"Really, Toph. If you are disrespectful or rude they might not except you and this wedding will be over. Then you will have to come back home and . . ."

My eyes widened a bit, horrified at the thought.

I didn't want to go back home. If I go back then they'll just find the next man they see and sell me off to him . . . and I might not be lucky enough to have someone my age. My body shivered in disgust at the thought of marrying some smelly, old man. At least Zuko wasn't old and I'd heard that he's a very accomplished bender – which was a plus. "Mother?"

She stopped her rambling, listening.

"Can . . . can you, tell me about Zuko? What's he like?" I asked, my cheeks reddening.

My mother had met him when she went to sign the proposal parchments and I felt a bit of curiosity overcome me. I might as well know a little bit about him since we'll be meeting in six hours.

At the alter.

"Oh, Toph – he quite a handsome young fellow I must say." She giggled, "Tall too, and very powerful. You can just tell, you know – he has that aura. He was very quiet throughout the signing but seemed confident. Though he did seem a bit impatient . . . and bitter but I'm sure you can straighten him out."

I smiled a bit – he didn't seem . . . _too_ bad.

The carriage began to slow down, coming to a jerky stop. "We are here Lady Bei Fong." The horsemen called.

I felt my side of the door open and a hand reached out to help me – but I smacked it away, offended. "I can get down myself." I snapped, jumping from the wooden contraption.

The ground was slightly blurry since my mother made me wear shoes but I could still 'see' there were eight people surrounding me and two more coming closer. "You must be Lady Toph Bei Fong, bride to Price Zuko." A women before me stated, coming closer as if to inspect me.

Remembering my mother's words, I nodded politely.

"Well come this way then, we must get you ready."

* * *

**switching POV. to third person's**.

* * *

Toph remained blank faced, trying not to scrunch her nose at the Fire Lord's servants.

"Oh you're so pretty! Just like a little doll!" A girl beside her gushed.

"Such clear porcelain skin!" Another said. "It's as if you're made of glass!"

"I wish I had your hair! It's so thick and silky!" Whined another.

Though extremely flattered, Toph wasn't a fan of compliments – mainly because she never knew how to respond. It always left her strangely flustered and at loss for words. She didn't like it.

Meanwhile, the girls around her where absolutely stunned by the small girl that sat before them.

She literally looked like a life size china doll. With her white skin, dainty nose and bow shaped lips she seemed as though she was carved from the most expensive glass. But what surprised them most was the fact that she's _blind_. Her misty, grayish/green eyes reflected the colors of whatever they landed upon, somehow enhancing her beauty . . . but adding to her frailness.

The pity they felt for her almost made Toph snort.

_'If only they knew I was an underground fighter . . .'_

"Are you silly girls almost finished?" A strict voice asked, entering the room with sharp eyes.

The head maid made her way over to the small girl sitting in a chair before a large, golden mirror. She was pleased to see that Lady Bei Fong's hair and make-up were finished.

The young Earthbender's midnight colored hair was done in a traditional earth kingdom style – the back done up in an intricate bun. Her fragile face looked even more doll-like with the light bit of make-up covering her lovely features.

"Beautiful job, girls." The Head Maid announced after inspecting Toph. "You look stunning Lady Bei Fong."

Toph shrugged her shoulder awkwardly, bowing slightly. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," the Maid nodded, rather surprised by the thank you. "Now, come along, we must get you into your wedding dress.

All the you girls in the room squealed as the Head Maid pulled out a wedding dress that consisted of the typical earth nation long tunic, but instead of the usual green, it was white with cherry blossoms embroidered on the edges. The cuffs were trimmed in dark green to match her long skirt.

Moving Toph to the middle of the room, the servants began to slip the silky material over her slim body.

**Knock Knock **

"Ten more minutes." A rough voice called from the other side of the dark wood door, causing Toph to freeze.

Ten more minutes . . .

Ten more minutes of being a_ kid_.

Ten more minutes of being_ free_.

Ten more minutes until she married the Prince of the Fire Nation.

Toph felt like she was about to vomit.

A veil fell over her mind and she couldn't move – _she couldn't think._ It was all moving too fast and it made her feel dizzy. She should have run away when she had the chance. She should have explained that she was _too young_, that she need _more time_ to adjust to the idea of marriage. Why didn't she just leave? Why didn't she just run – run as far as she could and never look back . . .

"Lady Bei Fong, are you ready?"

Toph broke from her hysterical thoughts, stomping her small foot softly – surprised to find they were behind the doors leading to her fate.

She wanted to turn then, the thought crossed her mind clearly . . . but something kept her back. She didn't know what it was but it kept her from screaming and tearing the palace apart.

Her heart beat painfully against her chest as the doors opened . . .

"Lady Bei Fong, may I introduce my nephew. Prince Zuko."

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**A/N : READ THIS :**

**This is going to follow the Avatar series but instead of Toph being twelve and a "cage fighter" I'm going to have her be sixteen and married to Zuko. If you don't like that, just turn back now and forget about this story. Thank you everyone who's reading.**

**Sorry if I'm moving a bit fast - I just want to get to the main plot!**


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